Multiple Intrusions

I was alerted to something being amiss when a long thing strip of plastic got caught up in the floor fan.  I followed it back into my master bathroom where I saw the entire window of glass blocks had fallen out... I peeked out the window and some were broken and my back gate was ajar.  I started to think it was less the ground issues that allowed the window to come undone and more an intentional act and someone was now in the house.  fear.

I think I awoke at this point... and after falling back asleep I dream this time that I went to check said window again and it was fine.. but this time my closet door was cracked open (I always leave it closed) - so again fear that someone was in the house.  I mustered up the courage to shove the door completely open and yell ready to fight off anything that might come out at me.  nothing.

I awoke again a bit panicky and fell back asleep.  This time Freshy was 2 feet from my master bath barking at the doorway.  fear again.  This time Ian walks out of the door completely naked - I'm scared and stunned and all sorts of emotions wrapped together.  So confused I can't even move.  I wake.

Back to sleep this time people are having a party in my front room - the front windows had been knocked out and there was some church organization using the front of my house to pass out flyers and push their agenda.  I had to run everyone off.  I wasn't scared. I was frustrated.  

This time when I woke up. I stayed up. fuck.

Excused Dream

I was at a bday party for my grandmother (again.. never would do this in waking life)  and she confronted on lady there with her kids and rudely asked her to leave... I got the feeling it was an unjust ask.  There was a present on the table in the other room that was for Danny.. it had some suit shirts and ties and I had to open it to put one other item in there.   It was a 'good luck finding a new job' gift and I think he scoffed at it.. uninterested in joining the working world again.

I later found evidence that Brent was.. well .. the same as I knew him to be or had learned him to be - he was trying to pull in new girls to chat with but this time he was open about being married from the start.. progress  I guess. 

I was living on a boardwalk in a quaint little cabin house... I remember the sun on the touch of stucco on the outside as I looked out my door at a stall that he had set up with a big beach towel that read 'fun facts' about him.

2Nights/2Fragments

night before last:
I fell asleep while Jonathan was waiting for me outside to go somewhere - I don't think I slept long but when I woke I rushed out to apologize - I've been so tired that I can't control when sleep comes.  He was fine with it... and he was also sick... I asked myself why didn't he cancel our plans if he was sick.  I said I'd take a shower and be out shortly and he was more than welcome to come in and wait.. he preferred to wait in the car.. probably to listen to NPR.

last night:
was in some city I've never been before to attend some type of benefit race - though we discovered that the whole thing was a sham.  I was walking the dogs and we stumbled upon 2 tarantulas.  that's all I can remember.

Fake Death Punishment

I've always been.. since I was a kid.. superstitious about writing down a dream when it involves death.  It's silly.. but I want record of this dream.

I was at work.. though the office was not like any office I had worked in before.. it was some hybrid of the office in Bellevue and ... I'm not even sure what.  Mom called to inform me that my sister Cath passed away.  It was shocking and devastating... I, in dream, felt as though I had an earlier premonition about losing someone close to me.  I fell to the floor and started sobbing.  I had this feeling like death is all around me, and I'm being purposely punished cause of something I did,  and my lack of control about it overwhelmed me.

She had 2 kids and a 3rd on the way.  What was going to happen now?

Either later that day or sometime during the night I got a phone call.  The voice on the phone said it was Cath. I wasn't fully convinced as it didn't sound like her on the phone.. her voice sounded different.  She tried to explain that she faked her death.. and why, if she was lying, did the death certificate say she weighed 97lbs less than normal considering she was pregnant.  I was stunned.  Completely shocked.  This isn't like Cath.. this is nothing she would do.. ever.  To leave her kids. And apparently abort the unborn one.. for what? - She ran away with another guy.. I insisted that she send me a picture.. some kind of proof cause I didn't believe it.. I asked if I could see her.. but they were across the country in FL of all places. 

The dream now turned into a strange POV of this guy she ran away with... he was a tall muscular black guy with long well maintained dreadlocks.... I could see through his eyes momentarily as he was on a morning jog.. the intersection of Cleveland and California streets...(And if you want to talk about creepy.. I just googled that intersection to see if it existed and it does - In FL even - WTF???: California Rd & W Cleveland Ln, Lehigh Acres, Florida) 

There was this weird sensation like he knew I was watching... and he didn't want to give up clues about where they were. Then later, a 3rd person POV, where he took a swim in a water way and some young kid jumped on his back for the ride.

How was I going to tell Mom and Jenn?  It was so unfair for them to hurt thinking she was gone when she is alive but trying to escape her life.  In dream I wasn't even mad about that.. I was too focused on the fact that she was alive vs. dead.. 

Cracked & Dilapidated Feelings

I was standing with his grandfather while he was cleaning a cement walk way - with precise detail to each crack even... we were behind what looked like an dilapidated cement wall that was once the front or rear of a house... I saw a car pull up... another girl that was interested in him.. and he may have once been interested in her... he excused himself from my company to go greet her... the feelings I felt by this are hard to explain... in dream I have no idea who any of the other characters in this dream were.. I didn't even really feel like myself... but I caught part of their conversation as it coasted in on the wind... he was explaining to her his feelings for me to her great disappointment.   It's interesting to hear people talk about how they feel about you when they don't think you are listening.  Why can't people talk like that to your face?

Fist Full of Milk

A couple had taken us in after some tragic event - I remember standing in a work room with the male figure at his work table that was next to a huge screen that overlooked a large grassy field... he said he used to have to bat things off of the screen and remind kids not to lean on it.  The woman figure turned out to be a real evil lady like a flowers in the attic type.... controlling.. she tried to tell me I couldn't make myself another glass of chocolate milk.. I ended up beating her up with the gallon jug of milk held tightly in my fist.

And then went to rinse out the cup I had used previously - then I woke up.

Disgusted Fragments

Grandma had died and we had to return back to deal with that.  I can't believe her husband was still living - he had dropped a lot of weight but he was still a sick pervert and I was struggling to hold my tongue and contemplating all the ways in my head to avoid his hug without coming off unsympathetic.  I gave in, not wanting to make a scene and allowed him to hug me.. I felt disgusted - I didn't want him touching me or touching my sisters.  Not that anything ever happened when we were kids - but now that we are adults I worry he would make us a target like he did to my mom and my aunt.  I've never disliked someone as much as I dislike him.  I don't even care for my grandmother I don't know why I felt so obligated to attend this in my dream.

Mom had said she hadn't told Dad yet about the inheritance - but that grandma was broke.  There was a worry or concern feeling about one of my cousins that had to be raised by these grandparents when my aunt passed away.

Something about working from home - but home was my old childhood home - which in dream was now mine as an adult.  I remember being in the master bedroom and observing the clock which seemed to protrude from the wall further than any other clock I had seen.  Pat was living there with me I think.. or he had at least stopped by.

Cigar Tricks

Quite possibly the most boring dream recall:

In a hotel with 2 people I have no knowledge in waking life of knowing.  One I was rather comfortable with and there were hints that we were sexually engaged with each other during this temp visit.

We had met a CEO big wig who pulled up in his black town car (he had a driver) - he came out smoking a cigar..that or I had offered to light his cigar so he could smoke it.. a bit hazy now.  He made a threat and to prove his thread blew up a helicopter which contained at least 1 person we were all close to.

We returned back to the rooms in which we were staying and there was this stuff strewn about that was of the deceased.. on top of her stack of paperwork she had left me a letter.  We all cried.  We were all scared and now knew we must return to our respective homes.

Eric came in to the main hotel room where he saw we had to replace some things that were used from the fridge.. and a lot of alcohol was purchased but not consumed by us.

I remember realizing I had 3 bags so it must have been a long trip.

Freezer Fragments of Aligned Thinking

The elusive Rik lived in the freezer in the garage of my childhood home.  There was no evidence of it - but I knew he lived in there.  It was thought his girlfriend was Robin Williams daughter.  I remember an odd focus on the frozen patty of a veggie burger.  Reminded me of the same focus we had on the flower water in Anti-Christ.

I was at a F2F again with my team and Bill and I stepped away from the group to talk about ideas we both had... which like most of our thinking was aligned. - Talked about making all the Consultants, Managers and bringing on backup Consultants to train as we walked around a gorgeous resort.

There were ideas about more robust IVR solutions - but it wasn't fully thought out yet- all the details - but it took a bit of the human element out, not every one likes that.

Fragments of a Backhanded Hatchet Panic

Random Fragments of a single dream:

Was having lunch with Pat... but all I remember is yogurt.

A big fish tank with only 1 thing inside of it.. it wasn't a fish... but I can't recall what is was.. a salamander or an eel... flashes to the old Riverbank backyard where it had become completely overgrown and the old pool had even had plant growth.  The thought was we could catch another whatever it was in this tank potentially living in the pool under the swampy growth.

Was witness to a thwarted attack that turned into another.  A girl rushed in the back door to escape a bad guy.  Another unidentified male companion that was with me and I apparently knew... grabbed a hatchet and beat the bad guy in the back of the head with the back of the hatchet multiple times... I screamed at him to stop.. it was too much and I feared he was going to kill the guy...I was worried he would have ended up getting charged with murder since it went beyond self defense...at one point I remember him taking a wooden stake and attempting to drive it through this bad guys head....it was so vivid and gruesome that I woke into a panic attack.

Cloud Ice 9/Chocolate Moon Touches Your Shoulder

Joe Satirani and Steven Wilson played a short set at work in the same day - I was on cloud 9.  This was the 2nd set for Steven and in the dream he remembered me from his first set.  A reporter that was there after the set for Q&A called me out for being disruptive or not paying attention just as the Q&A started.  All the members of the band were wearing costumes which included a gas mask of sorts and they were laughing it off.  

During the Q&A I didn't ask any questions, but instead ate a chocolate bar - after the Q&A Steven came out of a room sweaty with no shirt on and we had a small convo about where he keeps his concerts most updated cause I would have missed today's had I worked from home.  LNPP he said - which I found odd - I went to give him a hug and my lips touched his shoulder - there was stray body hair I observed and after I pulled away I awkwardly thumbed over where my lips had touched to remove any trace of chocolate that might have been left.

Walked back to my desk happy as can be and realizing I had to explain a new routing methodology that I have yet to learn myself.

Busted Charge

I had drove across the country and showered in gas stations just to make it to his son's game.  As we sat in the stands talking and watching the game, I saw his wife walk in... busted.  She was angry and rightfully so... and I just walked away - returned to the locker room where I had left my things only to have found them dumped out of my bags and scattered as if someone (she) went through them.  Mostly remember picking up a healthy number of colored pencils and flipping through a journal I kept to make sure none of the pages had been torn out.   Put them all back in my bag as quickly as I could.  Before I left the locker room I got a FaceTime call from my little sister - all of my family was busy working on some project and Marie was there visiting them... I was a bit frantic and they pointed out that it looked like I had a mustache - I looked in the mirror and saw what they saw.

On my drive home I was running down memories of visiting him at his house - an isolated farmhouse down a dirt road.  I stopped in 1 gas station to shower and although it was noted you had to pay for the shampoo and conditioner - there was nothing stopping someone from just using it freely.  When I walked back to my car there was an old high school bully girl sitting in my passenger seat using my phone charger - I ran her off but suggested that she get a "my charge" as they are great for emergencies. - Just then I realized I had left mine in the bed I had slept earlier that night.

Surprisingly even though the distance was great .. I seemed to make it home quickly and without any major incident. - But this was going to be the last time.

Cut-Throat Training

We had to take a work trip for additional Cisco training.   Pat and Brandon were both there.  Arrived at his huge brick building that looked like a former fire station was meshed together with an old library.  Just as we were pulling in.. the whole face of the building collapsed.  Red was the keeper of this building and his aging parents lived within.   There was an overheard premonition that he was going to be annoyed with the shoes his mom chose to wear. 

We had approached him from behind while he was assisting her with putting them on... Old fashioned nurse heels that had laces that tied the shoe on.

--
Later that night in a bar.. I treated Pat to a pot treat - it was either a cookie or cupcake that was green.

--
Next morning we were all dispersing to go to this training.  Brandon rode with someone else and Pat and I together - as we were driving down the street - I drove past myself and saw our hatch was open... it was difficult to slow the car down to turnaround...but realized that it had only been a reflection - so I got out and checked to make sure we didn't lose anything and closed the hatch.

We couldn't find the training facility so stopped at what was supposed to be my 1st hill apartment.  I was on a conference call and corrected someones assumption that Linda only has to be contacted for the first instance. I looked at the front of the training material and found the name of the site we were supposed to go to...I called for Pat - he expressed frustration for the treat the night before - he didn't like how it made him feel.

In the hall of this building - a failed boxer got stabbed by SE -and when his dad found him he said it served him right and he laid with him with a knife in his hand and stabbed or cut his own throat - he felt it was his fault that his son was a failure and so paid the price with him - the mom walked in an the dad shooed her away - I caught only a glimpse of her as she went to shut herself away in the bathroom.

Time Travel Math

Work trip abroad with colleagues I have never met nor are aware of in waking life.  I was struggling with the time difference and basic math to determine what time I left vs what time I would arrive after 24 hrs in the air.. was I traveling forward or backwards in time.... 

I looked down at my plane ticket and realized.. I was high risk for missing my flight home.... started to have thoughts to rebook.

woke up.

2 Headed Hooded Transformer

I had retrieved what was thought to be a water bug from a small pond - instead of trying to flee it allowed me to hold it in my hand - the back end looking like multiple crayfish whiskers packed tightly together...the front a loosely formed indigo blue rose... I had expected it to feel slimy but it did not... when I moved too sudden it tried to fly and I would raise my hand slightly to allow it to re-land.  at one point I felt this this start to ... sit up.. for lack of a better term... I felt a set of claws clamp down on my hand as the blue rose part lifted up... it ended up being a small hoodie - inside the hoodie now you could see a small cat's head wearing a double layer set of baseball caps... and next to the cats head was the head of an owl as if this this had 2 heads.  I had decided to remove the baseball caps, to free this animal of some human inconvenienced thing placed on it, likely for entertainment.

Panic Adrift in a Shark Sanctuary

I was helping an organization move a dolphin to a sanctuary in the middle of the ocean - it was dying and they wanted it to die in comfort.. but  I realized part way into this transfer that they had a fishing line hooked through it's dorsal fin and were encouraging the dolphin this way to go where they wanted - this upset me.  I had initially been under the impression that we were just following or leading the way and being followed.  It's sibling.. which happened to be a bird (apparently in dream a bird morphed into a dolphin when it grew up) - it got to close to this propeller system and they had to turn and dump the bird with force down into the ocean.

Once I arrived at the designated sanctuary - I realized I was on a twin sized air mattress in the middle of the ocean and couldn't see land - I didn't even know which way was which to get back home...I think I had one of the dogs with me as well.   Just as I looked out over the horizon I saw another dorsal fin sink below the surface and then I pictured in my mind it being a shark and it surfacing to test the taste of the object I was on.   I woke in a panic but the visions did not stop... panic continued.

Sorry SpongBob

I woke up in a set of SpongeBob SquarePants sheets with matching pillow cases on the pillows... I was sleeping at Mr. 11's house - I was tangled in the bedding and it took some effort to get myself free.  His wife was there... I felt bad... really bad.. she asked me to leave.. I apologized and sat in the bed next to her sulking with my hand on her shoulder... what could I say? - I just said "I'm sorry" and we sat there momentarily in an awkward silence - I remember looking down and hating the way my calves looked half on/half off the edge of the bed.  I felt like we needed to talk - but I didn't know what more to say, and she was clearly not in the right mindset to have this conversation right now.

Latex Give-away/Molar Pull-out

I was on a pier with a lady who was giving away her collection of various latex items - bags, dresses, catsuits, ect ect.  I told her that if there was things she really didn't want to let go of, to just say so...   there were a few she said she would rather keep - and so we set those aside.

The next day I was to meet her on the same pier but the water level had risen and washed out part of the road so had to improvise.

I pulled out 2 of my back molar teeth for something - and they were huge and interesting to look at.  I remember feeling and hearing the root tear as I slowly pulled them out with my fingers.... and the gap feeling as I put my tongue in the hole where they used to reside.

Odd Courting

I was being courted by Sean - and although he was a bit younger than me I wasn't bothered as I usually was.. and although I have so little trust in people, he was easy to trust, though I questioned what ever he saw in me - we would have made an odd pairing.  He was extremely sweet and it was hard not to fall for his charm.

Injectable Memory Double

I was allowed to first hand witness a memory of Bill's through some company like those in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - the memory was of a 3 way he had with 2 other guys in their leathers.  I had on rubber gloves and decided to involve myself in the memory - in this 3 now 4 way act.  He was bent over and all of a sudden it was just him and myself... I fingered his butt while I attempted to jerk him off - though found out he had a double cock - no wonder he was such a hit with the guys! - then I felt bad for messing up this event, for selfishly interjecting myself in this memory, even though he had no objections as it was happening.  I asked the company to revert his memory to what had actually taken place and to take me out of it.

Naked Witness

I was in our old first hill Seattle apartment - and while I was aware of Ian's passing in dream.. I was also somehow expecting him to be alive - was a strange mix of awareness and unawareness there.   I had walked to the end of the hall where Ishmael came walking out of his apartment completely naked doing some walk/dance thing - he recognized me and didn't flinch - just continued on filming what he planned to film as I slowly walked backwards to my apartment to reel in on what I just witnessed.

Decapitated Work Dreams

During the night I kept looking out of my east wall bedroom blinds to see if I saw any lights that would indicate someone is home at my neighbors house - I kept thinking I did but then had to wonder if it was the bright moon highlighting the windows.  In waking life I have called the HOA and expressed concern that the house looked broken into, or someone having left the house didn't fully close their front patio doors. - and although I called twice the doors when I got home yesterday still seemed too disheveled.

Back to the dream.. as I was looking through these blinds I witnessed a group of people making a trek through my backyard... in dream I had access to open this window - and I opened it and said get out.. the police are coming...   I ran over the other other south window and watched as they hopped over the wall and flipped me the bird... as if I did something wrong.  I was kind of creeped out now - that people were just passing through my yard in the night - I didn't and don't feel safe.

A motorcycle cop showed up he parked his bike in my backyard just outside of the east window... his partner had entered the neighbors house from the back... when he returned he looked white as a ghost... the owners had been decapitated - a mother and an infant baby... it was assumed that the father had the same fate or perhaps was being held - again, now I really don't feel safe.  I start scrambling to collect things in the house to leave - leave for good.

---
I was helping a woman who flopped between Jill and Maureen and her new start up business - she had no idea how to get the basis of routing to work to get calls to her employees that were in various locations.  Pat who flip flopped between himself and Sean, had applied for a job here - he had a joke resume - like not a care in the world resume that listed things like drinking beer on the river, ect.  But she liked it - when I got my hands on her system I figured out her local ACD first - when I had her log in there were 2 options that had picture representation.. a cartoon lobster and winnie the pooh.

78 Unkempt Days

I had received an updated list of names for those that needed to attend my call and saw that Cobra was on that list - I wasn't even aware that he had worked for our company - I immediately msg'd Pat and asked if he knew.   The scene flashed to the parking lot just outside of the west entrance doors - as the narration of Pat's reply played.  Said something along the lines of yes - his wife held some get together that allowed him to hook up with some girl (figures) - the wife was a tall blonde and she was carrying a tray of baked goods she had sprinkled some gold flake dust on to as she walked towards the building.  Cobra had long hair, thinning on the top pulled back into a pony tail.

When I walked back into the building towards my desk I had to pass various booths that were set up to demonstrate or sell something.  Turn the corner and I'm asked if I want to try a new energy drink - I politely decline and then Reed passes with a sugar free one in hand - I either said to him, or said in my head - "figures you'd be involved in this"

We got word that they were going to fire cobra for his appearance - which I contested - although I had only just met him today - he wasn't any more unkempt than 50% or more of the people that come in and out of these doors on a regular basis.  So then they said it was for attendance, Pat and I looked at each other and I asked - how much has he missed? - They shouldn't have told us - but the guy at the desk with the personnel folders - fiddled through the file and said "78" days.

$120 Scorpion Traitors

I had been carrying around a check Ian wrote me a while back - it was for $120 - but he hadn't filled the check out completely - I had to write in the rest of my name in the "To:" field - and sign his name - accidentally signing on the memo line I had to do it twice.  In dream he was alive - Oddly I was aware of his suicide in waking life, but not fully aware that this was a dream... though I had worried about the act taking place - we hadn't been in contact.

I picked up an annoying lurker of a friend K, he had a pet scorpion and had all the confidence in the world it would never sting him... this things was huge and rock-like muscular looking....  I thought him to be a complete idiot.  Sure enough, soon after we had boarded a train he was trying to show off and the thing stung him in the face. - he dropped it in a glass a soda and as he held his face he opened the door of the train and dumped it out once the train stopped moving.

Army troops were on board and I expected them to help but they fled.  Medics came and held him down as the reaction to the sting was growing worse - body swollen, uncontrolled muscle movements. - They ended up mummifying him in some type of mummy suit - and later when removed - it was now a girl that had been in the stung - and she was producing a liquid from her vagina that could soothe the reaction when collected and rubbed on the skin - the medics didn't buy it but supplied the girl with cotton swabs to collect and distribute where she saw fit.

Flash to the military guys who had fled, they had ran to the edge of a cliff where a superior had been - this leader in uniform was a traitor - and they all watched while a missile was shot right though his body from a capital building across the way.

Floating Jealousy

I was on an tubing trip down a massive river - the floatation island I was in could hold multiple people- but there were only a few of us in it - while a crowd of people behind us pushed and a scattering of people walked in front - so during this scene it was almost as if we were floating on air and it was a dirt path that those behind and ahead were walking on.  Marie was there, she had organized the event - she had showed me the total bill for lunch it was over $10K at some sandwich shop - her sister Betty had helped set up that order where people could go to get any sandwich they wanted.   I had drank a beer or two and had thoughts of guilt for being on this raft that other people were pushing - it would be easier on them if I were walking with them vs. being assisted along.  Bryan was one of the people ahead - he made a comment to the effect of why am I not like how I was when we first met.  Funny thing is, we had never met, but in dream I recalled a time before we did meet and I had been drinking much more and was out of control.  He liked drunk Liz better... vs. the quiet reserved Liz.

There were 2 other guys there that had met though being connected with me and they were happily together now - though they still got a lot of grief from others due to the same sex relationship.

---
I had been talking to Mr 11 on the phone - and the question of my time being wasted emerged - he made some comment about he can do what he wants to do now and that I matter not...  He started to tell me about a girl Jacki that he had plans to go visit so we would be out of contact for a bit... I was holding back emotions cause this was exactly the kind of thing I wanted to avoid, though knew was very possible from the beginning, yet I stuck around.  My voice went silent on the phone - I couldn't admit I was jealous, that I was hurt - but he could tell, he knew me well and then tried to make plans with me to make up for it.

Reluctant Circumstances

I'm reluctant to write down this dream - not in any specific detail because I have a long time superstition of it becoming true if I do (completely ridiculous I know!)... but I like to keep records.

Someone dies suddenly and unexpectedly under mysterious circumstances...  I felt very suspicious about it but the ME couldn't give me any info though I was directly related and would have been someone that they would have given info to.

Black Widow Problems Getting Dressed

I was masturbating on a bed in the backyard... noticed my neighbor through a crack in the wall as he was working in his front yard - wondered if he had caught me and knew what I was doing.  Then I realized there was a black widow above me and before I could slide off the bed it started to descend - I woke up.

I was listening to an old temporary co-worker talk about all of the problems she had since she left the company - I was busy trying to figure out what I was going to wear and found several shirts folded on top of my closet shelf that I forgot I had purchased and they still had the tag.

High Sadness, Secure Comfort

I had to petition to get access to a high security facility where Ian was being kept - Mom had ventured with me for morale support.  It was  huge cement building and we had to go down several stories underground before I got to the long hall that when you took a left at the end is where he had been kept.

I wasn't sure how he would receive me.  We hadn't had contact in quite some time... in dream there was 0 knowledge of his suicide.  His cell was large and instead of bars it was really thick glass with 3 circular holes in it to pass things through.  They let me inside his cell - I can't remember any words being exchanged - but he allowed me to sleep in the bed with him... to comfort and be comforted.  

There was a security camera that watched everything in his cell - my vision would flip between 1st person and then between watching the cam - and being the cam watching.

The stark contrast of sadness and comfort ruled the dream.

PooPotSpy Fragments

Sitting on the floor of a huge stand in shower with Pat - he had hand crafted brown clay into fancy poop logs - each of them different and joked that each came from Trent - I started swooshing water from the shower towards them to encourage them to go down the drain... although they were fake, the realism of it and the idea of it being real left me holding back a gag with each one...

Pot bust/sting operation

Spy vs. Spy but in real life - 2 girls trying to get one over on the other and each always outsmarting the other over and over back and forth.

Sibling Suicide

I was visiting my parents in some place they lived that I am not familiar with and there was another sibling there that did not resemble any sibling I have in waking life. 

This new sibling and I were home alone... the parents were out.  I was sitting in another room, but it was weird because I was watching what was happening through what felt like an out of body experience.  This girl bent over the sink and shot herself in the head.  I was instantly traumatized - and in shock.  Frozen to do anything thinking I can't witness this, I can't go through this again.

After a time I knew I had to go and see first hand - when I turned on the kitchen light - it was gruesome - there was blood on the cabinets where her body slid into it's current position - and I noticed she was still somewhat conscious.  Frantically I called 911 from my cell phone - the reception was bad and the dispatcher and police officer commented about it so I said I'd call back from my parents home phone - but the battery on the handset was low and I had to call in from my cell again.  I was crying hysterically trying to explain what happened.

It was too late.. she didn't make it.  I was completely and utterly devastated and I felt guilty that I couldn't act sooner, had I, maybe she could have lived.  Having to tell my parents was the hardest.

Frantic Jumbled Slum Candy

Had been following my sister (I think) and another girl around a historic old town Seattle... though it wasn't the Seattle I remember.. it was some fucked up jumble of the old style downtown of the city I grew up in (K-12) and with sprinkles of a slum-like feel.  I had 3 dogs in tow... none of them were on leashes and I felt constantly stressed out with them going into the road with traffic.  We were trying to locate the place I got my hair done last - it wasn't the first place I told them... my memory had faltered... so then I remembered the business card and said "Red Light" - but then quickly realized it was not the same place.   The place I kept seeing was in the old Pizza Plus building - but instead of it being a pizza joint...it had those old fashioned chair/dome hair driers lined on either side so when you walk in, you are walking down an isle of them on either side.

Those 2 got ahead of me, or I of them, and suddenly I felt lost and frantic because  didn't know where I was... this place was unfamiliar.  I ended up somehow backtracking to a house that we had been staying at... the girl that had maybe been the host... had arrived back with Jenn and threw a carry on suitcase against the wall... in the outer pockets, candy variety galore...I remember I wanted whoppers and not milk duds - cause milk duds stick to your teeth.... a swarm of kids showed up to raid the candy pockets.  

Inside the actual main compartment of the suitcase were drugs... wrapped in wrappers to make them look candy-like.. but they weren't for kids, weren't made that way to be attractive to kids.. it was simply a color coding used by the supplier to indicate the strength of the drug itself. The way they were wrapped made me think of bottle rockets...but with out the stick attached.

When I woke up it felt as though I had been crying in my sleep.

iPhone Being

Discovery of an iPhone 6 creature that was dwelling in my neighbors backyard - it hopped the wall to interact with me - it's body was flexible but only flexed when the thing was feeling or expressing emotion.  When it was sad - the body would bend backwards, almost melt-like, over your hand. - It's own hands made of even smaller versions of it's body... 

The thought was this thing had adopted me as it's care taker... and this 'thing' was an actual being of sorts with true emotion and feelings - not some programmed AI.  Emotions were high.

Fragments of Heart Dropping Stowaways

Lots of traveling - found stowaways in my luggage - a cat and her kittens... one went missing on the way back.  Driving towards a downhill that was so steep it could have been considered a cliff - anxiety through the roof as we approach full of anticipation of our hearts dropping once we started the descend. 

Somber Shame Slashing

He was riddled with shame but was paralyzed to do anything about it himself... he had approached a farmer who was tending to a clothes line contraption... that farmer spun around and with saws attached to each arm... sliced the the unsuspecting man multiple times across his chest... he did not fight back.. he felt it was deserved... he stumbled back and fell into a chair reeling in from his predicament as his shirt, slashed open, turned red with blood... the mood was very somber and hazy dream like... his lover approached with a hammer and just before it made contact with the slasher farmers forehead... the hammer opened and revealed a pistol... as the barrel met his forehead she pulled the trigger to avenge her lover's demise.

Dismembered Trauma

I was back in the Mommy Liz role - not sure where my parents were - but in my dream we were in my old childhood neighborhood - but the house we were in was not the same as the one we grew up in.  My sisters were back to being teenagers - Cath had long blonde hair that had a nice natural wide curl to it... she was running late.  Jenn had come in from the outside quite disturbed by something - it instantly flashed to something having had happened in the recent past vs. just then - Jenn had been hiding in costume to avoid dealing with whatever had happened to her.

I was holding her near the fireplace rocking her - another unknown lady was there trying to force information out of her - I rocked her and said.. it's ok if you don't want to talk about it right now... but eventually you will have to deal with this.

She shared with me that she had been sexually harassed or assaulted while she was cleaning out her car - her son had been in the car while it happened.  She told me who it was - it was a kid down the street - and I went to confront him.

It really was a kid - probably no more than 11 or 12 - he was in the garage playing with a handful of other kids - once confronted you saw a change overcome him. - He grabbed a machete and lunged - holy shit this kid was evil.  I remember hiding on the side of the house near the 2nd garage entrance - thinking "there is no way this little kid is going to out smart me"  I quickly realized this is no ordinary kid we are dealing with when I discovered one of his victims completely slaughtered and decapitated./

I went to meet with a detective in some run down downtown motel in a big city.  I walked up the narrow stairs and there was another body - well... the actual torso of the body was missing - but the cut off limbs and head were still there - only a huge blood soaked patch of carpet where the actual core of the body had been.

Everyone was baffled how is this child doing this?  I woke up with  no resolve - and the feeling as though I"ll never be safe.

Fragments of Panic

Backyard home invasions and PB & J on sandwich slims. - woke into a panic attack.

Additional invasion dreams with panic wakes

The prospect of being on a sinking ship in the middle of the vast ocean and no land in sight.. a roll of chains that operated the ship had become tangled, red hot and broke down - causing the ship to tilt to the side in preparation for a full roll over.

Embedded Guilt

I was in some room in some place I don't recognize - I had been eating sunflower seeds and lost track of one of them.  Later it was extracted out of under my skin.

---
I had been hanging out with Mr 11 and his wife... there was obvious discord between the 2 and even with myself included - and then suddenly after a couple days things got really good between all 3 of us.. it was then I felt I had to confess... We were sitting down at dinner and I started... but then realized Mr. 11 was missing... I asked where's <insert omitted name here>? - then the scene flashed to a map of the region and the words "commit suicide" flashed - which indicated he was going to attempt to take his own life out of guilt on one of the bridges - one of the more than 3 dozen bridge locations in this region...  He was on the phone with us while we searched - I felt frantic and guilty.  No death and no find... I just woke up.

Embers of Dreams within Dreams

I dreamt in a dream that my dreams were coming true.  These were not good dreams mind you.  Reminded of the resurfacing dream... and others... my house was a blend of my current house and my childhood home.  Outside my house today, inside my childhood house.  In this dream I had dreamt of the house fire.. and previously about collapsing walls.  I had been in the backyard bird watching when I saw the flames from the back bedroom.. which would currently be my master bedroom.. but inside it was my sisters bedroom from the past, but in the dream it was my bedroom this go.

I grabbed the water hose and sprayed down that side of the house until I no longer saw flames.  When I went back into the house no one believed me.  I went to my bedroom and through a crack in the corner I still saw smouldering red embers... I called out for someone to come look to prove what I was seeing was real - When I touched the wall it completely collapsed into the other room like it was cardboard or styrofoam.  Thus making the previous dream I really did have about walls collapsing true.

That's all I can remember - there were many more elements to the dream but they've been lost between wake and write.

Confident Knee-High Couch Talks

Mr 11 was visiting me at my childhood home... we were sitting on a couch that was against the west back wall - each of us bundled in a throw blanket as we talked... the blue hue from the TV that played quietly across the room.  It was an emotional conversation but I was mildly annoyed.. it was everything I had heard before over and over.  I had to leave to pick up Trent from the airport I was already running 10 mins late.. Dad was there at one point... I remember waiting for him to make a comment when Mr 11 got up to walk into the kitchen for something about how tall he is and what is it with you girls and tall guys (Mr 11 is 4" taller than my dad and my sisters husband is 7') but Dad stayed quiet and went to bed.  I set up Mr 11 on the other couch on the East wall ... I figured he would stretch his body out on it but he rolled himself in a ball on one cushion.. all bundled up.. I asked if he wanted to be reclined and I pulled the little lever to recline him and he was startled with how far back it reclined.   When I left the house, my middle sister and her daughter came out and were being noisy in the kitchen.. I went back in and asked for some common courtesy considering we had a guest who was trying to sleep in the living room.  I looked at the time and worried that I was too late to get Trent and he would have found some way else home by now.  There was a mix of sadness in my annoyance.. sad that this was probably the end of something.

---
Walking through a mall store that was being remodeled - a kink store that catered to situational type fantasy setups.  I wasn't there for myself, only curious and seems as though I knew someone involved in the renovation.  I was standing a counter while a male customer was paying for services.  I had spotted some knee high boots that I liked... they had heels and that is unlike me but I really liked them.. tried them on and it was a perfect fit.. they make me feel confident in a way I had never felt before.

Moving Separation Anxiety Two(Too)Bill's

My friend Bill had picked up a couple projects that required he travel to LA - he was happy about that because he was hoping to move there and it would give him a chance to scope living arrangements.  He had packed up a camper van and headed on his way.  There was a strange feeling of separation anxiety - things were going to change - people who were close were now going to be apart from me.  I had similarly reached out to a real estate agent to help me look for places to live since I no longer wanted to live here.. though I wasn't in a position or prepared to move so the action felt premature.   I think I saw my uncle Bill at one point in this dream - though it could have been another - though they felt connected.

Seattle Solicitations

Was trying to plan my trip to Seattle... couldn't decide on how many days I wanted to spend there... it was winter and would undoubtedly be cold... really cold for having been acclimated to the desert weather for going on 8 years now.

I recall driving an Audi taking a freeway exit and the roads were dark, wet with rain.

The PM for a project I am working was caught soliciting dick pics from some model guy through an e-mail chain at work.

Seattle Suicide Cracks Break Back In

I was in Seattle for some reason and discovered Ian was still alive... he had faked his suicide.  But he was not in a good place - he was still very much of the same mindset that would have lead someone to take their own life.  It was natural for me to want to help him, save him, try to make things better.  But even in my dream I kept questioning the obligated feeling and my actions.  I should have been angry, but it wasn't in me and I have high doubt I'll ever feel angry about it in waking life.  But I did think a lot in dream about the implications of my actions.  I still felt so unsure I was doing the right thing considering I knew I didn't want to be in a relationship with him and I didn't want to cause him any more pain.

I pretty much insisted he come with me - I got a peek into his living space and he was sleeping on top of a kitchen table with some random mismatched cushions on top that was a makeshift bed.  He was to meet us (who I was with I don't recall) back at the hotel room - and then I'd take him home to AZ with me.
---
Walked into my master bedroom and saw 3 very significant cracks down the back wall close together and looked related - the wall was also bubbled out in one huge bubble when I pushed it water gushed out the bottom near the baseboard and I felt the whole wall want to give way.

---
Some co-workers and my sister were at my house - and we were talking to my neighbor though my kitchen window explaining how we can break into houses to do our work when necessary.  It was kind of a joke as we only broke into our own houses (why I don't know) - but we all had a laugh when we watched the neighbor walk through the house and close and lock his backroom window.  

Jen was looking to rent some large black newer model Dodge Ram truck and she wanted my keys to get something out of my car and for some reason I was really insistent that she not drive my car to get said truck and I remember either her or I walking towards the front door in jeans that were way too long - and was focused on them bunched up under/around the feet sweeping the floor during the walk to the car.

Team Divide and Death

We were a team of cops meeting in another childhood town I lived in from somewhere between the ages of 1-3yrs old.  The team consisted of past co-workers, current co-workers and other individuals I have no knowledge of knowing in my waking life.  

We were divided - I got called by one group advising their plans and they wished the other half join them - but the other half was not interested in doing much with that group.  One was a very fem guy - he was dark skinned and was featured in my dream in a movie style format - though I was not in the scene, I was still having a conversation with him.  He was driving an old Cadillac type car - you know the ones that were abnormally long for some reason.. talking about how he wasn't going to drive to visit some relatives or something and how it's eating up his weekend time.  He was driving down a dirt road and I remember his frail arm and hand were steering while the other either lay in his lap or moved to his face in an anxious gesture.

Then later I arrived at another location and when I walked in the door one of the uniformed members of the team was on one knee at the coffee table crying.  Trent had died and everyone in this room was crushed about it.  I helped this fellow to his feet and hugged him... and oddly Trent walked in the room, though it was supposed to have him that died... no one thought any different about him standing in the room - giving shit to the men there weeping.

Missing Wall Projections on the Moon

Had moved into these apartments in a town where I had lived when I was between the ages of somewhere between 3 yrs old and 5 yrs old.  I came home to my new apartment one night after having had lived there only a short time and the walls between the apartments had disappeared between my apartment and the 2 apartments adjacent.  The lady that lived directly next door to me was laying in her double sized bed with her baby laying on her belly.  She was a cankerous woman and didn't seem too concerned or bothered by the now forced roommate situation.  However, I was and went to the leasing office to demand the situation be corrected - it launched an investigation to find the walls.

---
Co-worker picked me up to take me to an appointment on the moon.- The moon was HUGE and the surface very visible by the naked eye from here on earth.  As we drove down this long pier that sat over the ocean - you can see that something was being projected onto the surface of the moon - it was a map of sorts that overlapped the existing map that was physically on the moon - the thought was the government had been doing this since the Nixon administration.

I Need a Vacation from Emotional Frustration

A vacation to Florida with just myself and my 2 sisters - middle sister's car got towed and I later heard her on the phone with the towing company and she was becoming agitated - I ended up taking the phone from her and the guy on the other end was a complete dick - I tried to reason with him, explained the situation - was initially nice... but he wasn't breaking his asshole persona so I got nasty.. then I got frustrated cause that's not my character and I hate to be pushed to that point.. so then I became emotional and started crying on the phone almost begging him to help us - we had a long drive home and had to leave that weekend and he was telling us they wouldn't be able to help us until Monday.

Upgrading Gasmasks

I dreamt that I was trying to buy the house 2 or 3 houses down and across the street,, although smaller than my current house it felt like an upgrade...  during this same time I had  entered 3 or 4 of my gasmasks into a competition.. the owner of the house I wanted to buy was sponsoring the contest.

Airplane Transplant

I was stuck on a plane - I was only supposed to be going to Oregon - so that's a 2.5 hour flight at most.. but the flight drug on and on - we had to make multiple stops and pick up/drop off - various co-workers made appearances.. and then they were going to perform a transplant surgery on flight. Within our view we were witness to one man being taken off of life support to collect organs for another waiting for them.  I woke up before I made it to my destination.

Tiny Elephant Abduction

I abducted a baby elephant from a park of fountains... this elephant was tiny.  I remember feeling guilty at one point and recalling that I might have an elephant pet before and it has passed away cause it's the type of animal that is not meant to be domesticated... at the end of the dream I returned the baby elephant to the fountain park where it lived.

Artsy Cow Bombs

Damien Jurado was hosting a radio show out of a small box .. An artsy friend had wanted to ask him for something but was too shy, so I asked and Mr Jurado obliged.. The artsy friend was so ecstatic and said he would be open to designing any album cover or tour poster free of charge.

---
They were trying to transport a single dairy cow in a poorly constructed plywood box over a freeway... it was to allow the cow to see... Plenty of room for it to jump out.. and that's exactly what it did from an alarming distance.  It landed on the median and you could tell it's legs were hurt  Cars came to a complete halt... I was in the opposite side and there were a minimum of 4 lanes between myself and the injured cow I was trying to get to... it managed to get up and make it's way further away from me on the shoulder of the freeway.  Two other very large unidentified creatures came running in using herding maneuvers to try and guide the cow to a safe place for a recapture.  The cow had other plans and headed down the embankment into the water where it began to swim to what looked like safety.

---
The mole lady from The Blacklist appeared in this dream ... there was a car chase and running through multilevel garages all the while a timer on the wall of each level counted down. Some type of chemical or nuclear bomb was going to be set off and so many people were scrambling to safety .. I woke up before detonation.

Underwear Shopping for Naked Killers

Fragments.

Trapped in an indoor play area/pool and the girl that lived there was trying to kill me.

---
Road-trip to/from somewhere I can't recall... I think I had Hans and Rob with me... we encountered a very tall solid black man running on the highway and he was naked.  I pulled up next to him and he asked if we could buy him some underwear.  I agreed and we pulled ahead and I pulled into a store where I began to feverishly look for the perfect pair of underwear.. and I wanted an undershirt to match... every time I looked there was a different selection.. I asked the lady if I could look in a box that had a brand I didn't see on display... she pointed out they were.. but I still couldn't find them.   Then it hit me.. how are we going to find this naked man again to give him the stuff we bought? - I think AA spoke up and said that he said he would be at the Silvercloud Hotel.

Resurfacing Bumpy Dirt Roads of the Past

I was working remotely and for some reason he was there... he was in the background and I could feel his eyes... I had this growing suspicion that he was going to try to re-enter my life... I felt really disgruntled about that.

For some reason we had to have little miniature guinea pig like companions to do our job - my first one was about to retired and I had a replacement waiting in a tube... I realized I had made it wait for longer than I should have.. but I had built a bond with the original and didn't want to give it up... I opened the 2nd tube and the 2nd one came shooting out - they were really small and the only way I could describe them is about he length of an index finger and completely covered in the softest fur you could imagine... I can't remember eyes, noses or mouths.. they just existed.

They both took off and jetted into the room he was in.  "fuck" - I said to myself cause now I had to go interact with him.  I was cordial, as always, but my wall was double the height as it has ever been.  Somehow it came out that his wife had taken a sharp turn and was now staying mostly in bed and extremely depressed.  I started to feel sympathetic towards him.. but wondered if his situation was his own doing - maybe she had found out about his activities and at that point... that's all on him.  He made those choices.. he will have to deal with the consequences.  I was mad at myself for having let the wall come down any distance so quickly.

Later in the dream, or in a whole other dream entirely - I was leaving this remote location and had to take a dirt road at one point... I saw a train coming down the dirt road after crossing over a main intersection - it had to go through a few hundred feet of trackless bumpy dirt road before the track picked up again... a few of the tail end cars got disconnected and rolled back into the main intersection t-boning a car and causing others to wreck.  The police came and I was questioned as an eye witness... Dad showed up and offered to pave the dirt road to prevent this from happening again.. .it was going to be a hefty contract and he got it.

The end.

Broken Teeth & Past Blast Joe Visit

I was suffering from some sort of lock jaw that was causing me to put a lot of pressure on my teeth... I kept expecting them to break... and then one did .. my lower front tooth on the right snapped in half when I touched it... I didn't hurt but I was in shock.. then I reached in my mouth and one of my molars were so loose it came out whole... I called for my mom to call the dentist as my mouth continued to bleed from the broken and extracted tooth sockets....I kept losing the part of my front tooth that broke in half and retrieving it hoping the dentist would fix it.. and I started to feel for other loose teeth..

Either in the same dream, or having woken and fallen back asleep in my near 3 hour nap... I walked out into the living room of my childhood home and saw Cath putting my work laptop aside.. she had been emailing one of the coders at work as if she were me and I said that you know it's against the law to pose as someone else - I started to read the thread where they had been exchanging some pictures... but felt I didn't have time to deal with this mess right now... Dad was present and he didn't say anything... we were grown now and he was still uncomfortable to take an authoritative stand.

It was then I looked out of the blinds of my childhood bedroom and saw the tail end of a red car - and then remembered Joe was coming to visit - I was a mess... I had just arrived home myself from some trip earlier that day.. my hair was messy and partially faded at points showing the bleached blonde pieces where the dye had been stripped and not redone.. I had no make up on.. but it was Joe... my dear friend that has never forgotten my birthday and never needed some social media site to remind him... and I knew none of that mattered to him... he knocked on the front door and I opened it and immediately gave him a huge hug... I said he must be hungry and offered to go out to eat with him as we had looked in the fridge and it was pretty bare.  He started telling me about his ordeal to get to the airport in Las Vegas to come to see me... and then I thought.. why didn't he ask to be picked up? There was no need for him to rent a car...

Fragments of Mixed Material

Received this dress/costume I had been waiting for.. turned out to be slightly too big but I was OK with that... though some of the accessories were missing and later to be found mixed in with some things a friend had... I asked for them to bring them to me at a restaurant.. and that's when I noticed the material of the dress wasn't the material as expected.

Irresponsibly Thoughtless

This won't be the most thoughtfully recalled dream since I have waited now several hours to recall it.. 

Someone that resembled someone else, but wasn't the person that they resembled, left me a note... I drove and waited outside where I was asked to.  Their significant other came out and threatened me - though I felt the lesser of being the one in the wrong.. it still felt wrong... but I couldn't help myself.

Later at home, though in dream it wasn't the home I have today... he showed and was moving in... I got this overwhelming sense of being not sure what I was getting myself into.  He now resembled a younger him... and I was worried that maybe he was irresponsible and I definitely didn't want to be with someone irresponsible.  Time would tell.

The end.

Red Pickup Proposals

Massive windstorm that was capable of picking up vehicles.. I was recording video through a window on the 2nd story of a building that over looked some steep peaked mountains.  Suddenly a small red pickup truck was being hurled straight at me... I screamed for people to get down and away from the windows.  I escaped the death that would have surely come.  I returned to a restaurant where I had earlier that night met with Monica and some of her friends... I got the impression she was trying to set me up with someone to help me move on from her brother's (Ian) death.  I wasn't interested... I was only there to collect my purse off the back of a chair which I left behind when I went to venture on my own.  I told those at the table that it was nice to meet them but I had to go.  As I walked through the maze of tables to get out of this place, I witnessed 3 proposals.. 2 guys proposing to girls and 1 girl proposing to a guy... I couldn't quite figure out what the occasion was.  The last one witnessed before the exit, the girlfriend hadn't even seen her boyfriend get on one knee.. He waited there until she noticed with great surprise.

Roadtrip Theivery of Canadian Kisses

Took a long road trip to Canada - it was a West to East and back to West tour.  Not long after breaching the boarder to Eastern Canada I ran out of gas.  I had my 2 sisters with me and we decided to walk to try to find a gas station..  We got lost in some neighborhood - I remember most of the houses were built on hills and their driveways were steep... thought to myself that must be to prevent the snow from sticking.  We circled back to this convenience store where I had left the out of gas car.  It was no longer there.  The police came and it was discovered that someone had a ring of car thefts posing as tow truck drivers.. and it was assumed that my car was already being pieced out.  I was devastated.. here I was with my 2 sisters - far far away from home and in another country... what do you do?

Somehow ended up at Mr 11's place he took us in until we could figure out a way home.  I was nervous around him.. what a first meeting.  Before he went to bed he kissed me and while I enjoyed it.. it felt very awkward given the circumstances. 

Entrail Tug-O-War

Tarantula was dragging the carcass of a rather large animal by it's entrails towards it's den.... I was in awe how it could so easily drag something thousands of times bigger than itself.   Tug-o-war with a golden lab puppy that had been sitting in the passenger seat of a BMW.. the puppy won and later I caught up to it running trying to catch on film this event... The puppy was now dragging the carcass with the entrails in it's mouth and 2 jalapeno peppers were stationed on top.

Toppled Zentai Hugs

I was in a drugstore with a friend and we were both wearing zentai... he had given me a hug and I was in this quasi-state of shock to how much I enjoyed the hug... how long since it had been.. to hugged like that... I voiced my thoughts and wrapped my arms around the zentai man and held him tight for a long time.... I think he thought I was weird.. but I didn't care.. I was completely consumed by the feeling of this hugging sensation.

---
Kevin Durant relocated and there was something that happened in the city that caused a high rise to start to topple over - people were screaming and we were scrambling to save his kids.

---
Got corrected when I was talking about the geographical closeness of LA an Oakland.

Elevators and Naked Nipple Eyes

We lived on the 4th floor of some apartment complex that was doing some massive add-on with advanced features.  I remember being in the elevator and accidentally pushing the button for 2nd floor... realized my mistake and pushed the button for 4th floor and then pushed the 2nd floor button again to deactivate it.  I was surprised that it actually dimmed the light and now wouldn't make that pit stop on the 2nd floor cause of my mistake.  The elevator didn't just go up and down.. it moved across hallways and only went up when it encountered stairs.

There was a lot of sexual tension in the dream and I remember nude shadows.. and turning in a mirror to look at my exposed breasts.. and then imagined my eyes were additional nipples instead of eyes... though I could still see.  I laughed and got into the shower.

Startled Speed Bump

In that place between wake and sleep I dreamt that I tripped over a speed bump and it startled me awake.

911 International Steeps

I ran into Michael on a way back home from somewhere foreign - although it didn't feel like Canada - it was supposed to have been cause this is where he was originally from... it was a bittersweet trip for him... he was returning to his girlfriend/fiance that took him to live somewhere else.  We chatted about that - and something about a Mad Magazine subscription having had paid for something and he felt that meant he would be locked into a subscription.  My mom had previously been with me on this trip but we had somehow gotten separated.

We were on a huge shuttle bus and at one point I kept having thoughts that we were going to slide off the mountain side... especially when we had to turn on a very narrow road that had steep fall offs on either side.

---
A woman had to call into 911 to report trouble with her sickly son... the husband was the one that took the call - though it didn't seem like an emergency center she called in to.. the husband was set up in like a Radio Jockey  - she kept trying to explain the situation - neither of them realizing who the other was but he was having trouble hearing her with his equipment set up... he swung the mic out and back and at one point it dawned on him.. he was hearing about his own son.

Moved Decisions Lost

Mr 11 was helping me decide something.
---
Mom moved to a new place - it was on a really green/grassy hillside next to water.
---
Personal belongings to multiple people I work with were being kept in a huge body bag sized knapsack in the office while they attended an offsite meeting.  It was at some tire shop in downtown Modesto... I half drove half walked to try to make it there but I got lost.

Apocalyptic Appetizers

Apocalyptic zombie dream - we had made it to my parents house - which was where they live now.. but the house was way different... old fashioned with rooms like a study full of books down in the lower level of the house.  We had to stab or bash those things int he head.. it was disturbing to have to do that even in a survival mode.  At one point we obtained Pat's old Tahoe and I was contemplating keeping it vs. my car - had more power, more room for more people.. but then I thought about gas and the potential scarcity of it.  We had pulled up on a mechanics shop and it felt shady and unsafe.  I can remember being next to a set of train tracks and the train cars were carrying something potentially toxic.

---
Back in the childhood room again - though this time it was converted to look like an office room... the door had one of those lever arms that helps slow it's closure and toughen the opening... and the bottom of the door had one of those metal foot/splash guards (I don't know what they are called) - but in this dream it wasn't my childhood bedroom.. and it wasn't an office room... it was a restaurant.  Myself, Jennifer, and my 2 sisters Jennifer and Cathleen were all in here - laying on beds mind you... and Cath mentioned she was pregnant again - but she said it in a round-about way that made you conclude that's what she was saying... at first I was mad... her and her husband have 2 kids and he is the only one working - both financially irresponsible - but then I knew how much being a mom meant to Cath... and she's a damn good mom - so I let that go.  We had ordered appetizers and it was taking the waitress forever to return.. when she did... she didn't have any food.. only questions.. who had ordered the shrimp something or other because it was important to how to choose the paring with dinner... 2 of them had ordered a shrimp appetizer but the waitress was only concerned with a specific one.

Powder Fragments of HIt & Run Doggystyle Toilet Bathing

I had to bathe in a toilet and a sing in my parents master bathroom in my childhood home... though the bathroom was different from what that bathroom was/is in reality.  The porcelain was a dark mustard yellow - it was clean as I put my feet in the bowl and washed and rinsed using the sink.  The porcelain that made the sink was white.  So it was like the 2 different bathrooms mashed up together.

---
There were 3 smartphones hooked together as a contraption that crushed prescription pills into a fine powder.

---
My middle sister was walking my 2 dogs - though in the dream Reilly wasn't Reilly.. he was a pug..but had the same pattern of fur as Reilly has.  She got distracted and both dogs got hit by a car - the pug died instantly and Freshy was seriously injured.  I was crushed - she had gotten distracted by Leanne's new boyfriend or husband.  I went to find the body of the dead dog in the neighbor (old childhood neighbor) lady's overgrown backyard... it was unclear if Freshy was going to survive her injuries.

---
I was overcome with hormones and was going to let Fred Savage fuck me doggie style on the guest bedroom.  Gross. I don't find him attractive whatsoever - but I had to fulfill a need and he was there... plan was thwarted when someone walked in.

Thoughtless Emporium

I drove to some Emporium store.. it was a strange place on the corner of a rather busy highway.. it almost looked like a costume store as the initial entry way was full of mannequins with fancy boas and dresses... but as you enter into the main floor it looked much like a library does with the card files that tell you where to find a book.. tons of those... but they were all fancy beads. One of the sales ladies came and spoke with me to tell me about the store and pointed out a rare mattress they had leaning up against the wall. She spoke to me in a way that it made me realize she thought I wasn't high class enough for this store.. and I really wasn't... I mean.. I'm not going to spend $100 on some rare bead that was made and hand painted.. just nothing of interest to me. But how could she know that just looking at me? - that was the frustrating part.

---

I was house sitting.. but the odd thing was it was my own house.. the girl that Pat always had the hard time getting over showed up... it was startling how physically beautiful she was.. I wasn't sure her intention of being here.. Pat wasn't here.. wasn't going to be.. I got annoyed cause she was avoiding helping with any chores... using things at her whim and no thought to others... right before I woke up she said she was going to use the phone outside and instructed me to do something as if I was her maid.

Gosling Shower Add-Ons

Someone who looked like Ryan Gosling was living next door to me and for some reason we had a mobile bathroom unit that we shared that sat between our houses... but parked on the street.  I wanted to take a shower but I couldn't figure out how it worked.. it was a claw-foot type bathtub with multiple rigged up hoses and shower heads.  He came in to help me and explained that occasionally you had to shove the shower head to the drain to clear it out... it backed up really easily.

My mom and sister had emerged during this exchanged .. they were going out somewhere. - it was a simple pass through role... seems like Cath was wearing a dress.

I'm not attracted to Ryan Gosling in general.. but I have been attracted based on some characters he played (no! not The Notebook - haven't even seen it) - it's always more about who someone is really... so as I was getting to chat and know this RG doppelganger I started to be attracted to him...  the feeling felt mutual as we joked about doing additions to our houses so that we could connect them to have shared space and our own space.. we both had a need for our own space... but somewhat longed for the company of someone close.... being neighbors made that really convenient.

Fed-Up-Fuck

I was going to a movie with a few other people... Reilly had snuck into my car when I left the house.. and then again snuck out when I got out at the movie theater without my noticing until I was inside and he couldn't get in through the glass doors.  I went outside and picked him up.. he's the funnest dog to carry cause he's the perfect size...  I was just going to walk straight into the movie with him.. who cares! - when I opened the door to go into the actual movie seating.. there were other people with their pets.. big dogs... but the usher called me out and said I couldn't have my dog in there - and then here comes that anger that I can't/don't feel in waking life... I became completely belligerent  - but I was fed up and this was bullshit.. he was forcing me to leave and I gave in... but couldn't help myself and turned around on my way out and said something like Fuck you.. you... with some other fuck+made up word combinations (cause that is totally classy! <sarcasm>) - strange way to wake up disappointed with yourself but I'm sure it was an outlet from all of yesterdays frustrations... I had other parts to this dream or another dream but I can't remember them.

Barefoot Bellevue Hacksaw Rescues

I was back in Seattle and a light layer of snow covered the ground... there were people I haven't seen in years there... people I had worked with in Bellevue before I moved... I was trialing the idea of living there again... 

Apparently a lot of them lived in this 4 story dorm type apartment thing - I can only remember bits and pieces... Smulini was there, but I connected the most with Joe... he was the kindest person I had met while working up there and when he walked up to me I could see he had aged... gray hair was starting to show... he stood there with his hands deep in his jacket pockets like he always did... at some point... I had to rescue him out of one of the rooms in this building... he was chained up and I had to use a hacksaw to free him.  He was barefoot and I remember before we ran downstairs someone else said something about you are not allowed to be barefoot in here and if the house lady sees it (apparently the house lady is someone who oversees the building.. like a landlord) that we could be in trouble... so we watched for a window to sneak past.. he had big feet and was wearing a red t-shirt.  When the coast was clear he leaped down 5 stairs at a time.  There was a feeling as though this was reoccurring.. him being captured and having to rescue him without getting caught by the captor.

Rescuing Hunted Fragments

Pat and I rescued some girl in a hotel room who was trapped there by her stalker... we lured him out somehow and then locked him out of any potential way to get in.  (The room had adjoining room doors, ect).  That night Pat banged her while I slept on the floor.

The next day I had to leave to get some supplies at the store and I was driving behind what could have been an undercover police car... I wasn't wearing my seat-belt... and I saw a little red dot coming from the driver hitting me - we made eye contact through his rear view mirror... I backed off a little and slid my seat-belt on...  turns out he was not a cop... but a vampire and I had been tagged for his next hunt.

Salon Seams & Self Tattoos

I was in a backroom a huge nail salon getting my arm tattooed... Jonathan and Danny were in the salon waiting for me... Danny was getting his nails done.  Someone arrived and reclaimed the top panel of a latex hood I had... and I thought.. maybe Hans can help me fix this... the focus was strong on the seams of the hood.

When I emerged my arm was 80% covered in random tattoos and some of them I had did myself - and was worried that I messed up as I was falling asleep on the final one.  Mom was written in 2 places on my arm.. and it was all random and non-cohesive.. and although I liked it for that moment.. I was already starting to question my choices.

Thowing Plates in GPS Alley Ways

I was with a couple other people walking downtown somewhere... One might have been on a bike... We were trying to find the apt of a friend that was throwing a party... It was an obscure location and we had passed it the first time... The GPS told us we had to turn around...  We had to enter down an alley way between two tall brick buildings... Once arrived the place was packed but we learned the host was sick so didn't stay long.

-----
There was a handful of relatives staying at my house and there was a theme of them not respecting my things.. You have to understand that "things" don't mean much to me but when others don't handle your things with care it's frustrating... So I was frustrated..  At one point my washer and dryer were moved and one of them was damaged... I got so mad I threw a small plate at the wall and it shattered loudly on impact... This is so unlike me... But for some reason I felt bound/unable to speak... My sister threw a big plate which shattered on the same wall mine did to prove a point of it being completely unnecessary ... I felt alone and helpless.