11 Resurfaced Voids

I dreamt about Mr 11 resurfacing... strange to me how strong his presence was in my dream... I can't recall having dreamt about him (not that I didn't want to) while we were heavily engaged.  The void his absence has left has just been much more apparent this week for some reason.

Getting home from work... I pulled into the driveway of my childhood home and there was a big awkward sign sitting on top of the other car parked in the driveway... said something along the lines of wanting to talk and that the wife knew now.  I was massively hesitant... I walked across the street to grab a pizza for the girls for dinner... he was sitting on a bench with his wife and a child between columns ... it reminded me of the library in Modesto... he didn't see me.. and I was glad.. I didn't want him to... I wasn't ready for this confrontation.

I left and went back home... there was a ring on the doorbell while I was in the bath... I pulled myself together and it was someone who had been annoying me and wasn't getting the hint I wasn't interested... clueless even though I had been direct and then when that didn't work chose the ignore path.. I walked him to his car and sent him on his way.

My old boss showed up and all of a sudden I was meeting him in an atrium he was standing next to some chairs that sat against a huge window... and he was showing me the ENORMOUS hawks that were flying up to the window... they looked like something out of a Jim Henson movie with how exaggerated their faces were - I was reaching into my pocket to retrieve my phone to take a picture.  I was being recruited - but can't remember what I decided or how that part of the dream even concluded... all I could think about was Mr 11.

Bondage Man

Totured man who could change into a fully enclosed bondaged type character on a whim - though it wasn't for pleasure... he was truly tortured this was a punishment and he had to hide it from those he loved.  A waitress at a restaurant wasn't who she seemed and he could see through her veil to see what she really was.

I was back at home at my childhood home... I went to my mom who was laying in her bed and asked.. "where's dad?" - I can't recall the answer but it had to do with him being at work... then I asked about one of our dogs... but phrased it as.. I haven't seen him in a while... she stopped me and said I didn't want to know.

He had escaped and this lady that was mentioned earlier ... the waitress who wasn't who she seemed.. had picked him up on her way home from a late night shift as some factory... he had become vicious and bit her... another man trying to rescue my dog was then captured and punished... lethal injections... a series of 4 or 5 injections and death would come after the last one..   He was released after the last injection and he stumbled into this empty abandoned room where he obtained a shard of glass and started to cut into his leg in an attempt to drain out the last injectable to prevent his death.

The tortured man mentioned in the beginning was in an adjoining room.. aware of what was happening... this man who was desperately trying to prevent his death.. was now turning into what the tortured man was... The original called out to him and said something along the lines of... "do you know what is happening to you?" - The vision flashed to being behind this new guy transforming... he had a bondage mask on covering his face now.  The two were going to be a team.

Later they were in a restaurant eating and discussing things... more of the waitresses had turned like the factory worker lady who took and lead to the demise of my dog... she was infecting others and only this tortured man could see them.

Biscuits and Gravy Legs

They had chopped off his legs and he was dragging himself behind a building expecting to have his life put to an end.  But the lady that worked inside of the restaurant saw him and grabbed her gun to fend off the the perpetrators.

I was appalled by this and during a jog with people I worked with I made some sly comment about "at least you have your legs" suspect that those I said this to were responsible for what I had seen happen although I wasn't there.

After the jog these coaches were hand picking pairs to square off - it was thought to be a ping pong competition - but once up at the table you were playing against someone that was either making biscuits or gravy... the partner I had to work with tried to swap and make me responsible for making the biscuits so they could make the gravy.  So weird.

All I could think about was them complaining that a number wasn't working anymore.  

Vintage Halloween and Thrifty Tickets

I had purchased tickets for the whole family to attend some event... the total came out to over $600.  We had to go to a thrift store to retrieve them.  I remember thinking.. isn't it going to be awkward for Mom to bring Dad to this place where Jeff works?  (Jeff is deceased in waking life) - I remember pulling up and not wanting to go in cause I didn't want to be witness to the observance of discomfort. 

I could see Jeff peering out the window of this shop as we all decided who was going in.  Me and Jen stayed behind.

When they returned with the tickets.. I saw I was charged over $800... 200 more than what I settled online... I made mention that I would call to have it corrected.

Jen and I went to a different thrift store where there were a lot of interesting and expensive items... expensive because they were hand crafted and well crafted items.   Someone made this picture album of their cat but the binding was high quality black and red leather...and it was made like a trunk style box with a handle on top... each back flipped down and was part of the body of this box...  they were asking $99

Flash back to what was supposed to be my parents house... Mom and Dad were putting on some random video Jen and I had made (where was Cath?) 

It was Halloween - I remember driving through intricate paths that had Halloween stations for the kids that were walking around trick or treating... and thinking.. it's not very safe for kids to be walking in some of these high traffic areas.. and the booths are rather distracting to drives... someone did not think this through.

Embedded Fragments

While back at my parents house... we were driving on a country road which had 3 huge tractor tires embedded in the asphalt to serve as speed bumps.  I didn't see them nor did I anticipate them so we were going rather fast.  

It flashed to playing with a toy car on a wooden fence... play driving it along the top edge and then having it fall into a pond.  It was supposed to have resembled what happened in the big car with all of us in it.   I heard Dad talking about it the tires in the road as the car plunged into the small body of water. 

I reached in to retrieve it but was distracted by a frog and a duck.

Latex Fragements

While thrift shopping with Jen.. she had come across a vintage latex outfit worn by someone famous for a steal of a price.
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I had latex pussy lips that could stretch out 2-3 feet like a slightly tapered cylinder. Extremely awkward.

Fragmented Comfort & The T-Shirt Assault

I got a t-shirt for turning in an assault weapon.. it was confiscated from a car that was at a crime scene... I thought this agency had taken it, but they had forgotten it... so really all I was was returning it.  The two guys that ran it slept in the back room... it was hard to tell if they were together or not.

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Sleeping outside with a love interest that was unclear if he was interested in me... he didn't seem interested in much.   We went to a concert of some sort after traveling by foot for some time. I remember him sitting in a white fold out chair wearing a white t-shirt that had some black design or logo on it.. his arms were crossed.. it felt as though he was really troubled and when he was in need of comfort he always came to me.

Work Dream-Denied.

Work Dream... not even going to bother recalling it because I was supposed to have been off yesterday through Friday but so far... day 2 in and I'm working.. blarg! Sucks to be responsible sometimes.

First Person Life to Movie

It was like living a life and then having a movie made based on that life.

I had forced myself to watch the first part of the movie telling myself I wouldn't watch the 2nd half.  But of course I did.  I remember walking through a department store makeup section where there were booths where the makeup girls could sit you down and give you make up consultations.  I was crying and looking for someone I knew for comfort.

In the last part of the movie, which again, was made to depict something that happened to me in my life..  there were 3 of us I think (fuzzy) returning from a retreat... a friend of mine (who is no friend I know in my waking life) was with a guy I was friends with but secretly wanted to be more than friends with - they were riding on a motorcycle together and I was on another.. can't recall if I was solo or with someone.. but I feel like it there was only 3 of us.. you couldn't see me in the movie.. it was almost as if I was there but not actually there.. like a story told through my eyes.

I was happy for them, but sad for myself.  and then, the climax... they wrecked and I wasn't there to help or save them... the girl died on impact.. and my friend, the one who reminds me of Ian.. he laid in this field that in my mind was a patch of area to the right within the first few feet of the old dirt road in Oroville.  He had been riding with his cock out and he felt for it.. luckily it had obtained no damage in the dismount..   He was bloody.. and you can tell that his end would come soon... he jerked off in his final moments.

So I'm walking through this maze of makeup booths crying, about this movie, about this thing that really happened to me (not really in waking life... but in this dream life).  Telling the person that I was there to see that I shouldn't have watched it, but I couldn't help myself.

The scene cuts to going to this Ian-like friend's apartment - they were going to burn it down as the finale to the movie... focused on a small corner desk.. the corner was dark, and the cherry wooden desk was illuminated by a small desk lamp... on top of it was a small stop watch... you heard clicking coming from a drawer.. open it and find a grab bag of random items there including an unopened boxed toy from toy story.. one of those claw machine characters.  There was a stethoscope and another stop watch/timer that had been making the clicks..

That's all I can remember.